Everything Is Better In Mini

I think I’ve mentioned before my issues with Target, mainly being that every time I walk in Target, I walk out with far more than I planned because of bright colors and clever advertising. This was put to the test this week. I walked into Target with 2 goals: return a few items, and buy peas for making beef stew. I specifically took the most direct route to both areas of the store so I wouldn’t lose focus, and yet I still almost ended up with an additional purchase.

Why? Because right near the checkout counter they had mini water bottles. Mini water bottles! Well technically, they were for children, but what evs, the idea is that they were adorable smaller than the typical water bottle. I was immensely tempted to purchase them. The only reason I made it out of the store was due to a lot of deep breaths and mental pep talks. BECAUSE THEY WERE MINI! ZOMG how could I not want mini water bottles!?! Well, there’s the whole deal that I don’t actually want less water when I’m working out. If anything I want more.

Like my friend Erin, I too question whether I’m really a “grown up.” Mostly because of my obsession with mini objects. It gets me every time.

Actually I was quite distraught this week to realize I’m almost out of mini mountain dew bottles. They don’t actually call them “mini” bottles (I don’t think anyway, clearly I don’t pay that much attention) but they’re half the size of normal bottles of mountain dew and just delightful. I bought a bunch a few weeks ago and always have one or two in the fridge for my emergency caffeine days when tea just doesn’t cut it. I’m normally only allowed one a week maximum, as I don’t want mountain dew to become my new diet pepsi problem. But I realized this week that I only have one mini mountain dew left, and I haven’t seen the tiny bottles in stores again. I’m going to have to drink normal size drinks again. The horror!

A male friend tried to understand my love of mini objects once. It went kinda like this: he held up a straw and asked if he ripped it in half, if I would like the half straw better than the real straw. Well no, of course not. That’s not a “mini” straw, that’s a ripped straw. BUT, if he offered me one of those stupid red coffee stirrer straw things, that would count because they’re like mini straws and too cute. They function horribly as straws, but that’s not the point.

As far as weird habits go it’s not really a bad one. All it really affects is my consumerism choices and the functionality (or lack thereof) of my purchases. Well apparently some article says it also make me eat more, but I feel like that’s going to happen regardless. It just doesn’t seem like a very adult thing to me to still be gushing over mini items constantly.

OR, maybe it’s an important part of being a grown up.

Hear me out. What are babies but mini humans? Even Eric from True Blood realizes that. Maybe my love of mini objects is just nature’s way of pushing me to breed and take care of tiny humans until they’re no longer “mini” and no longer need me to care for them. This could totally be a real thing.

 It could.

But this is one thing I don’t think even I can believe in. I will not be adding it to the list of things I believe/do-not-believe-in-despite-lack-of-evidence-or-despite-contradictory-facts-against-it (yes, this list does exist, and it’s actually quite lengthy).

Could I convince somebody else to believe it? That’s possible. I’m actually really good at saying the most preposterous things with a straight face. I can’t lie about important things to save my life, but I can convince you without blinking that I used to live on a beet farm in Russia.

What I constantly wonder is why did I move to Texas when I love me some mini items. I didn’t realize how this would alter my life habits until I could no longer find mini tator tots in the store. All I want are my freaking mini tator tots. Why can’t I find them anywhere?? I find it beyond comprehension that they would be readily available in some states and not others. It’s a cruel state of the union issue.

TVD: A Few of My Favorite Things

Sorry to get any hopes up but this is a re-post as a few valued readers were getting some serious errors with this one. 

This is TVD week! To celebrate the season 3 release on Tuesday, every post this week will concern vampires and The Vampire Diaries tv series. Be wary of some spoilers, although I will avoid anything uber important from season 3.

I totally ended up watching Sound of Music this weekend, and while I just missed the "Favorite Things" song by a hair, it’s been in my head ever since. Thus it seemed an appropriate post title since we are concluding our week of The Vampire Diaries posts with random favorite things/moments from the show.

This list is a compilation of my favorites, and my friend Jenn’s favorites. Because sometimes we’re basically the same person, especially when it comes to TVD.

·      The fact that they get rid of the whole “diary” premise. Thank goodness. It gets old. In fact, for anyone that watches the first episode and can’t believe anyone likes the show – give it a few. It’s MUCH better when they’re not doing the diary thing.

·      Damon – enough said.

·      One thing that’s really brilliant is that eventually, they explain inconsistencies. It was driving me insane how vampires kept wandering freely into the Salvatore house. I thought they were just being lazy, but they explain why near the end of season 3.

·      The voiceover at the beginning. Every episode (after the first one) starts by saying “previously on the Vampire Diaries.” Well, being me, I didn’t realize they have a different character saying this every time. In fact the only reason I eventually caught it was because Rose says it in season 2, and I was like wait a minute, since when was that voice British?? I should point out, they literally do switch between like every character. It had been male, it had been female, it had been Damon, it had been Elena. And yet I never realized this until it became British. I feel like this says something about my mind and observation skills, but I’m just going to ignore that.

·      Elijah – he’s adorable!! He’s so honorable and sweet. He’s like a puppy, and how often do you find vampires that remind you of puppies? I would totally hug him in a dark alley.

·      Just the plain old fact that this show can get you so emotionally invested. I end up literally screaming at the tv. Not in fear (normally) but I get so worried about these characters, and angry when they act like flaming retards!

·      Anna – in the words of Jenn, “she's so damn cute... you know after how initially creepy she was.” Anna is like the only one of Jeremy’s gfs I’ve actually liked him being with. That’s saying something. Plus did anyone else’s heart break when she realized he was using her?? Poor girl.

·      Oh plus one thing I haven’t discussed yet (there’s a lot to talk about with TVD) is how they handle villains. The big villains aren’t just randomly evil in TVD. Eventually, we get to see the softer side. I really love this about the show. It’s actually something I think differentiates it from True Blood, as opposed to all their similarities. I mean seriously, who liked Marnie?? What about freaking Maryann??? On the other hand, when Klaus gave Caroline that bracelet I melted. Sadly Caroline actually has a bit more willpower than me.

·      The Damon/Alaric bromance. I know, I know, I already had a whole post about this. But it’s sooooo good I can’t do a list of my favorites without putting it on here again.

·      And then there’s the video below. One of the best moments of the series. Because it won’t make as much sense to non-viewers, some background – Stefan is actually the one walking in the room, in this episode the brothers keep acting like they’re each other. Make sure to watch the video full screen, and watch Stefan’s eyes. Totally a good mock imitation of Damon’s crazy eye thing. 

 

And this concludes TVD week! Season 3 is officially out on DVD, although I will wait a bit before buying. ONLY because I already have season 3 on Amazon video... don't think I have self restraint or anything crazy.

TVD: Vamps & Tramps, Not Apples & Oranges

This is TVD week! To celebrate the season 3 release on Tuesday, every post this week will concern vampires and The Vampire Diaries tv series. Be wary of some spoilers, although I will avoid anything uber important from season 3.

When comparing vampire myths I have mentioned True Blood a few times, and with good reason. The Vampire Diaries and True Blood are actually remarkably similar. In fact, it’s a common question in the world (yes, the whole world, of course not just neeky people chatting online) which series is the better one to watch. This is up for some debate.

Now I have watched True Blood up to this past season, which I haven’t watched yet. I have watched The Vampire Diaries up to the very last episode in season 3. Thus I feel qualified to make some suggestions.

As I said, the series are super similar. Knowing how everyone loves a good list, here are several areas in which the shows overlap:

·      Both are based on a book series.

·      Both shows develop a way for vampires to be in the sunlight.

·      Both draw in other supernatural elements… vampires, witches, and werewolves – oh my!

·      Both introduce werewolves in the second season.

·      Both have main (hot) female characters who are non-vampire.

·      Both main female characters have only one sibling, a brother.

·      Both main female characters (mfcs) have dead parents.

·      Both mfcs initially still live with their female guardian.

·      Both mfcs fall in love with a “good” vampire.

·      Both mfcs then get some hard core lust going on for a “bad” vampire.

·      Both mfcs are summarily torn between the two.

·      Both mfcs have “special” blood.

See? Practically the same show.

The big differences between the two are sex & violence. Since True Blood is the adult show, you would expect it to be the more sexual & violent of the two. Well, you’re half right.

True Blood definitely has more sex, and it’s definitely more graphic. This is not a show to watch with your grandma (your grandma’s already secretly watching it at night when she’s done reading Fifty Shade of Grey). I have actually heard people say before that a large part of why they watch True Blood is for the sex.

Yes, please.

Now TVD on the other hand is a little more subdued with the rampant lovemaking. Oh it happens here and there. Vampire hormones apparently are constantly stuck in horny teenager mode. But it’s certainly not every episode and there’s certainly far less body exposure. Not that I have anything against Eric Northman strutting around in the buff. Faaaaaaaaaaaar from it.

But when it comes to violence, I actually think the shows are pretty evenly tied. True Blood is a bit more visual and gross. TVD is a little more realistic with its violence and torture. However, where TVD totally has True Blood beat is the body count.

As I’m said before, in The Vampire Diaries people die ALL THE FREAKING TIME. That wasn’t an exaggeration.

Not only do people die, the ones that die are RELEVANT. They’re not just killing off random characters you met for a second and figured would probably die. Sure, True Blood has had some very shocking character deaths, but TVD totally has them topped, even if you only count characters that appear in the first two episodes and then die.

This is one of the things I really like about TVD. When a character I like gets into some sort of undesirable situation, I legitimately do not know if they’ll survive. But this is FANTASTIC. I mean sure, it makes me quite cross at times, but it also keeps me on the edge of my seat. I have no false sense of security. Heck, I wouldn’t be surprised if at some point they kill off one of the three main characters. I am invested in some of these characters. Not knowing what might happen to them keeps me watching, keeps me tense, and keeps me screaming at the screen.