You Are What You Read

The other day I was swapping books with my friend Kevin. I brought him Game of Thrones because everyone should read it, and I was perusing his book options and grabbed Ender’s Game. I then found another book I wanted to borrow, but instead of giving it up immediately Kevin wanted to know if I was currently reading something.

For people that read in a linear fashion, this question was appropriate. The issue was that Kevin had not yet read the book I wanted to borrow, so he was trying to determine if I would get through Ender’s Game, this book, and another book if I was reading one before he would finish his current book and Game of Thrones. I don’t really think of books that way, so it was a new concept for me. I’m now wondering if that’s how most people read: one book after another in the order you get them.

As for me, typically I’m reading around 3 books at a time.

This is a large part of why my house always looks cluttered. As I glance around my living room there are currently 11 books sitting around. I long ago started running out of space on my bookcase, so I now keep various stacks of books. Some are meant to go back to friends, some I’m just getting rid of, and I currently have a stack of books I’m debating whether or not to keep.

How many of those books am I currently reading? Well, not all 11. That would be excessive.

This week, I find myself in the midst of several books. I’ve been reading Les Miserables since the end of December. Unfortunately I have it on my iPad, so I rarely read it at home. I’m still torn on the e-reader debate. There are definitely some benefits. I actually downloaded Les Miserables while stuck in an airport. When traveling, it is convenient to be able to take my iPad with several books on it and not worry about finishing them and running out of reading material. However, it drives me insane that I can’t read while a plane is taking off or landing. Inevitably I end up taking both my iPad and one regular book.

It’s a very rare case where I can bring myself to read off the iPad at home. I prefer the feel of a real book. I can make exceptions for book club selections when I’m trying to read something by a specific date, but otherwise I just find myself waiting until the next time I travel.

So while I am currently reading Les Miserables, I have no plans to finish it in the near future.

I have two other books that I’ve been reading for quite awhile. In This Skin, by Simon Clark, and Dead City. Both are horror stories, and I’m about halfway through both. I stopped reading for now though because they were FREAKING ME OUT. I do like a good horror story, but eventually I get to this point where I have to stop or I won’t be able to sleep at night.

Back in college, I could more easily finish these kinds of books because I was constantly living with other people. It was perfectly okay for me to sit and read while everyone else watching tv or played a video game. I don’t really have that opportunity much anymore. What am I going to do, call my friends up and say “hey can you come sit around my house while I read a scary story?” Nope. I’m holding both of these books until the summer. I do much better out by the pool. Warmth and sunshine are still very acceptable methods of keeping the boogie men at bay.

What am I actively reading in the house? About four books. One I’m actually re-reading, and that would be The Lady of the Forest. Since I’ve read it many, many times before there’s no sense of urgency. Another book I just started is Neverland. I’m finding it hard to read. Typically I like to read while I’m snacking, or eating dinner. This book has been quite descriptive, and there’s a hardcore ick factor to it. I may end up saving it for the summer as well. Then I have The Forest House, which I think I started Wednesday after finishing Sex, Lies, and Online Dating. It’s good so far, but will probably take a bit to get through. The last book I’m actively reading is The White Queen by Philippa Gregory. I’m a little over halfway through but they’ve killed off some of the characters I like, and I can’t decide whether I’m invested enough in the main character to finish or not.

That’s why besides those four, I have two other books you could say I’m “reading.” I started both The Needle in the Blood and Mona Lisa Awakening in the last few weeks, but I haven’t gotten very far in either, and at this point I’m pretty sure I’m just not going to read them.

There are many books in the world I have started, but never finished. This can happen for various reasons. If I don’t like the main character, if I heartily disagree with something they do in the book, if I don’t like the writing, or if at the end of the day I’m just not sucked in.

In Mona Lisa Awakening and The Needle in the Blood I like neither the characters or writing. I haven’t yet firmly decided to give up on them. Again, I’m not very far in either book. Maybe it gets better? But with so many other options I haven’t felt like devoting the time to books I don’t particularly like.

Surely this is how other people read as well?

So I guess I can understand Kevin’s concern that I might not finish a book before he’s ready for it. On the other hand, I borrowed Ender’s Game on Friday, and I finished it yesterday. Why? Because it was AWESOME. When I focus on a book I get through it very quickly. That at least must be the same for everyone that reads.

Pick the Lie

Marilyn Monroe wasn't even her real name, Charles Manson isn't his real name, and now, I'm taking that to be my real name. But what's real? You can't find the truth, you just pick the lie you like the best.

-Marilyn Manson

Today is Get A Different Name Day, yet another of those random holidays ever so dear to my heart. Who even knew there was a whole day devoted to getting a new name for yourself?

Personally, I find this brilliant. There are so many people stuck with names they hate because their parents are either too boring or too original.

My name has plagued me for years. My first name, Jessica, was THE most popular name for girls the year I was born. Apparently my mother is a sheep and just follows the trend. She had main naming rights; my father was only allowed to do my middle name. My middle name is much more acceptable, but I’ve never felt comfortable going by it like other people I know that randomly tell you their middle name as if it’s their first name.

Going through school, there was at least one other Jessica in every single one of my classes. I had to laugh when my friend Kyli posted this link about 90s life and it mentioned the Jessica thing, because it’s TRUE. Many Jessicas were clever and went by shortened versions of their name such as Jess, or Jessie. Ironically enough, the entire reason my mother named me Jessica was so she could call me Jessie, and then she decided she didn’t like it. I personally have never felt right introducing myself as anything other than Jessica, so that’s generally what people call me.

Now I’ve since been told that when I introduce myself, I actually say my name oddly. Supposedly instead of saying Jess-I-Ka I say something more along the lines of Jess-Ka. Crazy. I don’t even hear myself saying it that way (same idea where I can’t hear myself saying muse incorrectly but everyone tells me it’s wrong so I’ve just stopped saying it at all).

It always really bugged me that half the other girls in the world had the same name as me. This meant I was relegated to being either the “nice Jessica” or the “short Jessica” or some other designation that I didn’t always like. This also meant meeting people and hearing things like “you don’t look like a Jessica” or “huh, I’ve never seen a Jessica dress like that.” I was so frustrated by this, one of my college application essays was all about how my name drove me to excel in life to separate myself from the Jessica pack.

So in theory, I should be renaming myself today. Except I CAN’T. How do you choose a new name? How do you redefine yourself and make it stick? Fact, I struggle just naming things like stories or characters. I have several baby name books somewhere in the house just for when I’m writing and I’m stuck on naming my characters. Not that the books actually help when I’m stuck on a name. They do however inspire stories sometimes where I see a name and just instantly get a character.

The only things I’ve ever enjoyed naming were my mixed CDs. Yes, back in the day when I still made CDs for the car instead of plugging in my iPod, I greatly enjoyed giving them interesting names. Since all my CDs were completely random mixes of music, the name didn’t really matter as long as I could remember it. This is how I ended up with gems like “Sugar Sweet Exposure,” “Beware Closing Doors,” and “Don’t Microwave the Monkey.” Oh and don’t forget the frequent passenger favorite, “Tie Me Down & Go GRR.”

We Kill Witches. What Do You Do?

I was at dinner last week with my friend Pietro and some of his friends when a commercial for Hansel & Gretel, Witch Hunters came on the tv. My reaction was instantaneous. Pietro ignored me, as he’s known me for years and is used to this sort of thing. His friends were quite startled. “Are you really THAT excited for this movie?” they seemed desperate to know (to be fair, due to my super excitement I was pretty much bouncing in my seat in the middle of the restaurant). I had to explain over and over just how amazingly awesome it was that the movie was finally about to be out. They gave me blank stares.

Of course I saw Hansel & Gretel over the weekend. Heck, I’d probably see it again if I could talk someone into it. And having seen it, I can say I LOVE the movie. Of course I can also say I think a large number of people are going to hate it. It’s just one of those.

Who will like Hansel & Gretel? People that like stylized, over-the-top violence, bad ass characters, snarky humor, and aren’t expecting a great plot. Picture a combo of fairy tales, sarcasm, and 300.

I have to say I am so incredibly happy the movie turned out well. I found the imdb page ages ago, and as the release date kept getting pushed back I started to fret that this would be another Snow White & The Huntsman. That may have ruined my year. I am already counting down the days until Hansel & Gretel is out on video and I can buy it and watch it a bajillion times.

Since I love this movie so much, I’m not going to do a For The Few post with spoilers. Oh no, I can’t even imagine accidentally spoiling this movie for any of those rare individuals that’ll love it like I do. Instead, I’m going to do the next best thing: a list of my favorites! Nothing below will impact your experience watching the movie. Pinky swear.

• The candy house from the beginning. It looks awesome. I have been seriously craving giant lollipops for the past week.
• Jeremy Renner as Hansel. You already know I love Jeremy Renner. Nothing in this movie goes against that. He’s edging dangerously close to Hugh Jackman on my potential celebrity boyfriend list.
• Jeremy Renner rolling under the bed. I cackled.
• Gemma Arterton as Gretel. I’ve loved Gemma Arterton since Prince of Persia. She is AMAZING as Gretel. I want to be Gretel for any upcoming costume events.
• Peter Stomare. If you don’t recognize the name, he’s had such interesting roles such as Satan in Constantine, Serge in Chocolat, and the guy eaten by compys in The Lost World: Jurassic Park (which I consider one of the worst deaths in that movie btw. I’d much rather be eaten in one or two chomps than slowly picked to death. Gross). In Hansel & Gretel he’s a giant jerkface.
• The anachronistic weapons. Love ‘em.
• The anachronistic constant swearing. Certain people need their mouth(s) washed out with soap.
• The sibling interactions. This is how I imagine my brother and I acting if we were totally awesome witch hunters.
• THE GORE! Oh, the many ways a person can splatter…
• The fanfiction potential. Seriously, people need to get on this. Stat.