24 Symptoms of a Fitbit Addict

I realized something. I have well and truly become addicted to my Fitbit. I was walking to the breakroom and hit the button to see how many steps I already had, when I saw the alert. The Fitbit was DEAD. There would be no tracking of steps that day. There would be no heart rate monitoring.

I went into a full out tizzy.

Now thankfully it happened that one of my coworkers had their charger on them. I immediately sat at my desk, stopped all movement, and plugged in my Fitbit. Then I thought about it. I couldn’t tell you the last time I didn’t wear my Fitbit other than the 30 minutes each morning when I take it off to shower (yes I am aware that I take long showers) and charge it. The only reason it was dead was because I am in the midst of moving and kept forgetting the charger at the wrong apartment.

Yet I don’t have many of the typical signs of Fitbit addiction. You see, I have given up on my step goal. Most Fitbit addicts plan their life around hitting that 10,000 step high each day. While I fell into this category when I first got my Fitbit, the past two years of struggle with my freaking busted knee of death and pain have completely changed my perspective. Somehow though, I’m still addicted. How do I know? Here are some signs of Fitbit addiction that have nothing to do with a step count:

1. You recognize other Fitbitters by their gear.
2. They recognize you too, because you never take your Fitbit off. Step count > fancy parties.
3. You can both do this, because even if they don’t have the same Fitbit as you, you have eyed up the other options on the website so many times that you can recognize any Fitbit model at a glance.
4. This is why you are also prone to long conversations with other Fitbitters about why you each choose your specific model and the pros/cons of each.
5. You actually open every email you get from Fitbit. Every. Single. One.
6. Because you NEED to know what new models and/or features are coming out.
7. Even if you’re not planning to buy a new Fitbit anytime soon, because remember, YOU ALREADY OWN ONE.
8. Actually at some point, you may have owned more than one Fitbit when you made the life-altering decision to switch models.
9. You’ve also have tracked your water intake.
10. You’ve tracked food too.
11. You have even logged exercises when Fitbit doesn’t recognize them. Cleaning DOES count because it’s an option.
12. You have planned your life around when you take your Fitbit off to charge it.
13. You do this to make sure the Fitbit NEVER DIES.
14. Because you know that if your steps/sleep/stairs weren’t getting registered, there would be no point to the day.
15. Which is why if you ever forget to put your Fitbit back on after charging, the whole day is ruined.
    
16. EVEN IF this was during a lazy day when you weren’t getting in a lot of activity. It doesn’t matter. You still want to know. Because charts.
17. You have used said charts as evidence that you didn’t sleep well and people should give you more caffeine/stop sucking at life.
18. If you have heart rate monitoring, you have used said charts as evidence that people are STRESSING YOU THE F*CK OUT.
19. Which speaking of f*ck, you have totally checked your charts to see if sex registers on them.
    
20. And if you have heart rate monitoring, you have looked to see if particularly noteworthy experiences have higher peaks. Giggity.
21. At least once you’ve shared a milestone on social media. To be clear, one of the badges Fitbit awards, not a sex-related-tracking milestone.
22. You get unduly excited when friends then get their own Fitbits.
23. You then proceed to judge them based on their weekly step count.
24. You also identify which friends you refuse to do challenges with, because those bitches would always win. 

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