24 Symptoms of a Fitbit Addict

I realized something. I have well and truly become addicted to my Fitbit. I was walking to the breakroom and hit the button to see how many steps I already had, when I saw the alert. The Fitbit was DEAD. There would be no tracking of steps that day. There would be no heart rate monitoring.

I went into a full out tizzy.

Now thankfully it happened that one of my coworkers had their charger on them. I immediately sat at my desk, stopped all movement, and plugged in my Fitbit. Then I thought about it. I couldn’t tell you the last time I didn’t wear my Fitbit other than the 30 minutes each morning when I take it off to shower (yes I am aware that I take long showers) and charge it. The only reason it was dead was because I am in the midst of moving and kept forgetting the charger at the wrong apartment.

Yet I don’t have many of the typical signs of Fitbit addiction. You see, I have given up on my step goal. Most Fitbit addicts plan their life around hitting that 10,000 step high each day. While I fell into this category when I first got my Fitbit, the past two years of struggle with my freaking busted knee of death and pain have completely changed my perspective. Somehow though, I’m still addicted. How do I know? Here are some signs of Fitbit addiction that have nothing to do with a step count:

1. You recognize other Fitbitters by their gear.
2. They recognize you too, because you never take your Fitbit off. Step count > fancy parties.
3. You can both do this, because even if they don’t have the same Fitbit as you, you have eyed up the other options on the website so many times that you can recognize any Fitbit model at a glance.
4. This is why you are also prone to long conversations with other Fitbitters about why you each choose your specific model and the pros/cons of each.
5. You actually open every email you get from Fitbit. Every. Single. One.
6. Because you NEED to know what new models and/or features are coming out.
7. Even if you’re not planning to buy a new Fitbit anytime soon, because remember, YOU ALREADY OWN ONE.
8. Actually at some point, you may have owned more than one Fitbit when you made the life-altering decision to switch models.
9. You’ve also have tracked your water intake.
10. You’ve tracked food too.
11. You have even logged exercises when Fitbit doesn’t recognize them. Cleaning DOES count because it’s an option.
12. You have planned your life around when you take your Fitbit off to charge it.
13. You do this to make sure the Fitbit NEVER DIES.
14. Because you know that if your steps/sleep/stairs weren’t getting registered, there would be no point to the day.
15. Which is why if you ever forget to put your Fitbit back on after charging, the whole day is ruined.
    
16. EVEN IF this was during a lazy day when you weren’t getting in a lot of activity. It doesn’t matter. You still want to know. Because charts.
17. You have used said charts as evidence that you didn’t sleep well and people should give you more caffeine/stop sucking at life.
18. If you have heart rate monitoring, you have used said charts as evidence that people are STRESSING YOU THE F*CK OUT.
19. Which speaking of f*ck, you have totally checked your charts to see if sex registers on them.
    
20. And if you have heart rate monitoring, you have looked to see if particularly noteworthy experiences have higher peaks. Giggity.
21. At least once you’ve shared a milestone on social media. To be clear, one of the badges Fitbit awards, not a sex-related-tracking milestone.
22. You get unduly excited when friends then get their own Fitbits.
23. You then proceed to judge them based on their weekly step count.
24. You also identify which friends you refuse to do challenges with, because those bitches would always win. 

1.      

The Spreadsheet Sickness

So you probably have figured out that I like lists. I love tracking things. Not only do I have a spreadsheet just for tracking books I read, I also have one for monthly rental cars, work expenses, using PTO, and I briefly had one to track the outfits I wore to different clients (can’t be caught wearing the same thing two times in a row!). It’s not like I’m even that good at spreadsheets, I just really, really, really like being able to track things and see what’s happening. Certain friends of mine who will remain unnamed would probably make a comment about how this ties into my alleged control issues, but I really just see it as a manifestation of a family disease.

That disease being the Spreadsheet Sickness.

There are so many things I can say about my family, besides the fact that they’re awesome. But for today, we’re going to concentrate on our obsessive need to track and organize. See, it’s not just me.

Growing up I didn’t initially realize there was anything weird going on. I only saw my extended family for holidays since we lived about 6 hours away. It wasn’t until I was older and more involved in family activities that I started to sense the madness. I already knew that entire half of the family was obsessed on arriving to things early (and this has been a constant issue between my dad and my mom and thus given me warring instincts where I agonize over being late but also hate being early) but I didn’t know they actively planned to do it.

You have to assume for every family event, there will be a spreadsheet. I remember when we were planning a surprise birthday for my grandmother (and that also involved pre-plans on how to get every together secretly for the planning phase) we had a spreadsheet with not only the necessary food & decorations, but also potential gifts that I believe listed not only cost but something like emotional significance?? When everyone used to gather to bake Christmas cookies after Thanksgiving we had a printed spreadsheet that listed every cookie, oven temperature, time to prep, time in the oven, etc. We still have spreadsheets every Christmas to track food, supplies, and who’s bringing what alcohol (because THAT is super important).

I didn’t really think this would ever pass down to my generation, but that was before I became Game Commissioner.  I’ve already discussed the various and ridiculous efforts I’ve put into running games on Christmas day. Well, one of the other duties I’ve picked up for our Christmas celebrations is helping my dad make grilled cheese for everyone. My first time assisting I was called in last minute, so I took orders on a piece of paper. I decided that was HIGHLY inefficient, so this past year, I made a spreadsheet. No, seriously, see:

This way not only was it easier to identify who had what and where the grilled cheese was placed on the grill, it also gives us data on which cheeses were popular and what we probably don’t need to bring next year. And omg if we do it again next year I’ll be able to track trends. You have no idea how excited I get about this!

The next hint that I’ve really succumbed to this family disease was when I went on vacation with my parents this month. My dad kept asking for our plans of what we were going to do each day. My mother was failing at making a list. So, I made another spreadsheet, which allowed me to color code things that we had definitely decided on (green), versus things that weren’t set and depended on other factors (red).

The final nail in the coffin was getting a Fitbit. I’ve had it a little over a week, and DEAR GOD I love it! I’ve been tracking my steps per day, activities, calories burned, calories eaten, water consumed, and sleeping habits. It’s the ultimate gadget for people with an obsessive need to track things. I adore the fact that I can look at my app or log in online and see my best day of activity versus my worst.

I love having visibility into what I’m doing. I had already started tracking my jazzercise classes for my own purposes (35 classes this year as of this morning!) but now it’s very clear to me when I’m doing more outside of class instead of sitting around doing nothing. I feel more motivated to walk around. Not going to lie, sometimes I walk in circles around my apartment at night to increase my step count. I’ve also learned that apparently I drink TONS of water in a day. I drink over 70 ounces of water every single day. One day I had about 110 ounces!

Is it good to encourage my obsessive need to track things? Let’s go with yes, because I said so.